Nukem the Blaster

You remember very little of your old life. You were born in a muddy trench and raised lovingly by your sister. As a child, you took pride in nanonucleic bioengineering, but it soon became obvious that you were meant for bigger things. That's where your obsession with pizza came in. It was essential in your desire to escape your fate, albeit unsuccessfully. Your time for greatness is here. Go ahead, make our day!